Blog Neglect

Clark September 16th, 2008

It’s been a long time because I’ve been so busy…adjusting to shore-based life?

In the mean time San Francisco has world class sailing, and slowly but surely I’m exploring every nook and cranny of the Bay. One caveat though: It’s a windy place, or at least it’s usually very windy in ‘The Slot,’ where Condesa is moored, so it’s pretty much right into the firing line from the moment I leave the dock. The main has been double-reefed all summer long.

While I’ve been at the general task of getting my shore-based life back together and figuring out what to do with my life, I’ve still been flogging magazine articles (see the September SAIL for an article on Peru) and doing some boat repair work both on Condesa and on other boats…I’m just so good at it.

Begin Commercial–Your boat may not be circumnavigating, but I’ll treat it as if it were. Electrical, plumbing, mechanical, diesel repair, painting and varnishing, rigging and rope work. Attention to detail. No job too small. Bay Area only, unless you want to fly me someplace beautiful. Inquire within.–End Commercial

Condesa has made countless sorties directly across the bay to Angel Island and Tiburon, where the legendary Sam’s has public dock space right in front of the most expensive bar on the Bay. Let’s hope the coast guard doesn’t start enforcing the drunk boating laws.

She’s made two other more significant voyages into the heart of wine country, one up the Napa River to Napa, another up the Petaluma River to Petaluma. In Petaluma, unfortunately, our voyage ended at the D Street bridge, which is closed for repairs until November. On the Napa River, the voyage almost ended unfortunately when the Mare Island Drawbridge nearly closed on Condesa, which would have necessitated many repairs, which would have run long past November…

I was solo sailing up the narrow Mare Island Strait, riding a two-knot current. I sailed close enough to the bridge to write down the bridge keeper’s phone number, tacked against the current, and then a friend called on my mobile phone. While I was talking to him I heard ‘ding ding ding’ and the bridge started to open. I assumed the bridge keeper saw me waiting and opened the bridge for me. I said a quick goodbye to my friend, rolled the genoa all the way out, jibed, and resumed riding that two-knot current at a good clip right toward the gap in the bridge–I didn’t want to keep all those cars waiting too long. As I neared the bridge a power boat came through the other way and ‘ding ding ding’ the bridge began to close. I made the crash tack of all crash tacks, rolled up that genoa, got the engine started and floored it. Condesa was about thirty feet from the bridge and finally started creeping upstream just as the bridge got to about the height where it would have taken Condesa’s mast off at the spreaders. Or maybe it would have come down on TOP of Condesa’s mast, and God knows what that would have done.

When I called the bridge keeper he was obviously flustered, and I don’t think I needed to remind him that it was important to look BOTH WAYS before closing the bridge.

After that I ghosted up the Napa River, wing and wing, as topless maidens leaned over the banks to feed me pinot grapes and top my goblet with the vineyard’s finest. It is a little known fact that there is deep water up to within four blocks of the eateries and tasting rooms in downtown Napa. There I met up with Condesa record-holding crewmember and container ship accident veteran Ian Blake, his girlfriend Lauren, and her friend Carrie, who were all up there to run the Sonoma Half Marathon. I did not run the Sonoma Half Marathon. We all sailed back to San Francisco together a few days later, and this time gave the bridge keeper plenty of notice.

The jubilant and blistered half-marathoners:
The jubilant half marathoners

The voyage up the Petaluma River was a bit shorter, the water a bit deeper (the Napa had some dicey spots), and the Petaluma was maybe a bit more scenic. This time it was with my mom and my Aunt Carole from Phoenix, who were mutinous and unruly:

Mom with Carole behind the wheel:
Mom with Carole at the wheel

This weekend it’s up into the Delta, a galaxy of cruising that we’ll only be able to scratch on a long weekend.

Some typical Central California riverfront scenery:
Typical California riverside scenery

So on shore-based life, everything is going swimmingly except for that pesky job/income/what to do with my life thing. I have no desire to sail around the world again any time soon, and all the things I’ve been missing out on all these years are pretty nice: community, companionship, volleyball every Wednesday, and a nice Thursday tradition too.

I carry a device in my pocket that can call anywhere in the world, show me maps of the world and where I am on it, take pictures and videos, send and receive emails, tell me tides and currents, and surf the web. I knew all these technologies existed independently, but to have them all in a device the size of a pack of cigarettes was a bit of a shock. The first time a friend showed me such a device I demanded he return to his planet with his magic box. How long have I been away, a hundred years?

To close, here is a picture of some cute little ducklings:

Made the Paper

Clark June 23rd, 2008

I’m small town famous: http://www.dailypilot.com/articles/2008/05/31/politics/dpt-aroundtheworld053108.txt

She plays me out to be quite the daredevil…and a small correction, that’s an 800-foot container ship, not an 80-foot container ship.

Condesa Sails Under the Golden Gate

Clark June 17th, 2008

For the first time in ten years Condesa has entered a port with no plans of leaving. She’s in her new berth in San Francisco, which looks up at Coit Tower, and straight across the Bay to Alcatraz.

One of my most frequently asked questions is, “Which was your favorite country?” Lately my answer has been, “California.” I’ve said before that I always thought of Californians as angry people stuck in traffic. Maybe I was the angry person stuck in traffic. I was also expecting unspecified run-ins with the authorities. I guess my only experiences with Homeland Security and the like in recent years have been in airports, where they are less than kind. I figured that after being away for so long I’d be coming back to some hassles, but nothing could be further from the truth.

I already mentioned how nice, easy, and cheap it was to put into San Diego, but this same treatment continued on up the coast, and the California coast competes with anywhere for natural beauty.

In Newport Beach, my home port, of course I got good treatment. With a free dock in front of the Beek house and wholesale fuel at the family fuel dock, what more could I ask for? But even if I didn’t have connections, Newport is a friendly port with free anchoring and free moorings.

Condesa set sail from Newport with Panama and Peru veteran Tony Burger. We made an overnight sail to Santa Barbara to visit my brother Jim (aka Rufus) and a host of friends. We’d planned to anchor out, but it was rough as guts when we got there. We radioed the Harbor Patrol, who were sweet as pie and had us tie up to their dock while they pulled all the stops to accommodate us. We ended up in a great berth for $23 per day.

Tony left and Beloved Cousin Rocky took the train down from Santa Cruz:

Rocky and I motored out of Santa Barbara and out to the Channel Islands for a little cruising. We visited the Painted Cave, on Santa Cruz Island, which was very deep and dark, and had some very angry sea lions hidden in the back. We traded standing off on Condesa while the other went into the cave in the dinghy, as it’s too deep to anchor. After the Painted Cave we cruised around Santa Rosa and San Miguel Islands, both of which have very scenic and snug bays. We never saw another recreational boat in the Channel Islands (it was a Monday), just a few fishing boats.

Condesa from inside the Painted Cave:

Then it was around dreaded Point Conception, the second windiest place to Point Reyes on the California coast, but we had an easy time of it. We charged through the night to the protected anchorage at San Simeon, where we looked up at Hearst Castle. Morro Bay and San Luis Obispo are two other snug harbors, but we passed them in the night. The next morning the sky was brown and the sun a blood red orb. It’s California’s wildfire season again, and we could see the Big Sur and Bonnie Doon fires burning from well offshore:

From San Simeon it’s a long haul along the cliffs to Carmel, Monterrey, or Santa Cruz. We chose Santa Cruz, as it’s where Rocky lives. We could see the headlights on the cars winding along Highway 1 all night long. Once again the Harbor Patrol in Santa Cruz was eager to please and we got a snug berth in the harbor, this time for $27 per night, where we saw this guy, a California Sea Otter, snoozing in the marina:

Case in point: One can cruise the California coast at a leisurely pace in total comfort. Where there aren’t beautiful natural anchorages there are bustling ports with reasonably-priced berths for transient yachts. All of these ports jack the price up if you stay more than a few days, which makes good sense to me. With the exception of the stretch between Monterrey and San Simeon, it’s all daysails. The next time I go cruising it might be a month’s sail from San Francisco down to Newport and back, combining haut cuisine in California’s ports with remote beauty on her offshore islands.

From Santa Cruz to San Francisco was an historic voyage with cousins Rocky, Joe, and Joe’s daughter Abigail. Rocky is half responsible for this whole cruising odyssey mess, and Joe is responsible for the other half. I went cruising the first time with them on Starwake when they were returning from a trans-Pacific voyage to New Zealand and back. In the ‘About Me’ entry on this website I talk about being green with seasickness while watching a hammock full of vegetables rot and drip in the tropical heat above my bunk, while figuring out how to get myself out of this horrible, horrible error in judgment. Going with them was the horrible error in judgment, and look what it ended up doing to me. How fitting that it would all begin and end on a sailboat with Rocky and Joe, but I guess I’m looking for landmarks and significance in every little thing at this uncertain juncture in my life.

Joe and Abigail:

We had rare south winds most of the day and sailed past the Pigeon Point lighthouse and Point Pilar, home of the famous big wave surf spot Mavericks. (It wasn’t going off.) As we neared San Francisco the wind veered to the west and strengthened, and a flood tide screamed under the Golden Gate at three knots. My friends Elias and Jim were going to take pictures of Condesa going under the Golden Gate, but couldn’t get there in time. “Can’t you stall a bit?” I looked at the GPS, marking our speed at nearly ten knots, with the current accounting for three of it. “Um, no.”

We sailed right up to Condesa’s new marina, with various Beeks scrambling around to drop sails, and made our entrance…into the wrong place. But the wrong place was much more photogenic than the right place, so it’s good that Elias and Jim were there to photograph it. Once we’d entered the right place, we tied her up, had a celebratory shot of tequila, and Rocky, Joe, and Abigail set out for Santa Cruz by land. Condesa hasn’t moved a muscle since.

The Accident Story

Clark June 3rd, 2008

The legal battles are over and the Library of Congress has finally reverted the publication rights to the author, me. For the first time on the web you can read the Condesa container ship accident story by clicking here.

If you’ve already read it in the magazine this version is pretty much the same.

Looking back at over two years since the accident and one year since the story was published, I’m still an idiot. How in the hell did I get run over by an 800-foot container ship? You’d think something that big would be easy to avoid.

I mentioned before that AIS (Automatic Identification System) could be the answer and could have prevented this disaster. AIS is the answer, and in the last year these units have come down in price and are starting to be standard equipment on cruising yachts. I’m sure that in another year or two they’ll be as common as radar. I’m not going to run out and buy one today because I’m planning on staying put for a while, but I will certainly have one aboard the next time I do any serious cruising.

AIS is getting a lot of talk these days. In the May issue of SAIL, Steve Dashew penned an article on the subject, in which he mentions me in the first line. (I’m famous! I’m famous! I’m the poster boy of marine accidents, even two years after the fact!) Ben Ellison has something new to say about AIS almost every month, either in print or on www.panbo.com.

So if you haven’t already read it, enjoy the accident story. If you happen to be on a boat, wait until you’re on land before reading. This is the story that cruisers tell their children to scare them into staying awake on watch.

Home Port

Clark May 28th, 2008

I’ve been stalling for a week. What the hell do I write when the trip is over?

My dad joined me in Cabo and we set sail early the next morning. By the next day it was cold and we were back to boots, hats, and gloves. People think Baja is all balmy desert, but that California current and its associated upwellings make it a cold place, even in summer. Once we were well into central Baja the landscape and climate were just like-dare I say it-Patagonia. My dad only had ten days, so our anchorages were short and sweet, just long enough to cook a hot meal or grab a few hours of sleep. We had some true westerlies and were able to sail about a fourth of the way. We made one nice long tack of about seventy miles from Cedros Island to the mainland. Usually this trip is all a motor-a-thon.

About halfway through the trip I got a 24-hour flu with a 102 degree fever, which is always fun on a cold, rocking boat. My dad surmised that since he’d had his free senior citizen’s flu shot, and I hadn’t, I got sick and he didn’t. Damned septuagenarians and their superior immune systems.

We pulled into Ensenada and my dad took a taxi to the border. I spent another night and filled up on fuel again. I’m no dummy: It’s half as much in Mexico-half as much!-as in the US these days. I filled every jug and bottle I had and topped the tanks.

I set sail at 4AM on May 14 and pulled into San Diego early that afternoon. The second I entered the harbor a coast guard boat turned on its sirens and-yeah!-boarded the power boat next to me. I was counting my good fortune when there was a second coast guard boat that boarded me moments later. Usually I hate the fascists, but the guys were so darned polite and friendly I couldn’t help but like them. Condesa passed all tests with flying colors and everything was ship shape by coast guard standards.

I tied up at the quarantine dock with the help of my new friends and there was nobody around. I called the number on the end of the dock, but it was out of service. I left some messages and sat tight. After a while my cell phone rang and the customs guy gushed apologies: “Sit tight, boss, we’re on our way!”

I was bracing for rude and threatening treatment from my countrymen at Homeland Security in the post 9/11 world, but they were sweet as pie too. The agent was training another guy, but they never went any further than the cockpit. After a few minutes the papers were filled out and he said I was all done.

“That’s it?”
“That’s it.”
“You’re not going to search the boat?”
“Nope. You’re all done. Welcome home.”
“I’ve been out of the country for nine years. I could have been subverted by terrorists and be carrying all kinds of dangerous contraband on this boat. No swabs? No dogs?”
“Nope. Welcome home.”

And then, at a bit of a loss as to where to keep the boat for the night, I found a public marina run by the City of San Diego right next to the customs dock that costs $10 per night! I’d heard rumors around the world that San Diego had become a less than friendly port for visiting sailors. Nothing could be further from the truth and I’d be proud for any of my foreign sailing friends to have the same experience I did.

I had a little party aboard with some of my San Diego friends, then Matt, the builder of this website, joined me the next morning for the final push to Newport. He made the maiden voyage with me back in 1997, just a few weeks after I bought Condesa (when her name was still Destiny).

We tied up at the Beek dock on Balboa Island that afternoon, nine years and four months after leaving. Thank God I’m off that hell ship.

Last Monday I started my commute up the 405 to my new job in Los Angeles in my white 2002 Nissan Sentra. Just kidding. I don’t have a job and I’m going to slow roll that one for a while. Better to settle in a bit and leech off my family before doing anything rash. It’s summer after all.

My plan is to sail up to San Francisco in about ten days and try life up there. So I’m still cruising! It’s not over! I’ll cruise to Santa Barbara, and the Channel Islands, and make a glorious landfall under the Golden Gate! The trip’s not over until I say it’s over, and it’s not over! I’ve been avoiding the real world for nine and a half years and I’m not about to give up now.

The Sea of Cortez Nine Years Later… By Guest Blogger Elias Terman

Elias May 14th, 2008

What a difference nine years make. When Clark and I first crossed the Sea of Cortez in February, 1999, I was living in Mexico City, running one business and starting two others. My life couldn’t have been more hectic. The dot com boom was in full force and I was engrossed in my own Internet venture (I eventually sold it to a public company which, like so many other tech companies during that era, fizzled out during the subsequent dot com bust). It was a roller coaster. Anyway, I decided to take a break from the mayhem and flew to Cabo. Clark had only recently embarked on what he thought was going to be a 6 to 12 month sailing adventure down the coast of Mexico. Diesel was about $1 a gallon.

From left: Clark, Yours Truly, Carl and Steve during that first crossing of the Sea of Cortez in 1999. Carl still lives in Mexico City and just became the father of a beautiful baby girl. Steve lives in Hong Kong and is a VP at an investment bank.

Clark, Yours Truly, Carl and Steve during that first crossing of the Sea of Cortez in 1999. Carl still lives in Mexico City and just became the father of a beautiful baby girl. Steve lives in Hong Kong and is a VP at an investment bank.

Fast forward nine years later. Having “gone corporate,” I took three days of paid vacation and flew from San Francisco to Mazatlan, arriving on a sunbaked, Friday afternoon. Clark met me at the airport and after getting settled back on Condesa we ferried to a nearby island where we had fresh fish and beers on the beach. I couldn’t help but notice that both Clark and Condesa are in even better shape today than they were nine years ago. Clark had rebuilt the entire galley according to own exacting design.

The trip took about two days and we motored more than half the time as there wasn’t much wind. On a boat, someone always has to be on watch to avoid getting run over by a container ship. My nightly 2 to 5AM shifts passed surprisingly fast, gliding across the sea in my floating planetarium. I watched the moon rise out of the Pacific on both nights.

We caught four Bonito (which we threw back) and caught a huge Mahi Mahi a mile off the coast of Cabo. I guess there’s a reason why they call it the sport fishing capital of the world.

This is the largest animal I’ve ever killed. I gaffed him (yes it was a male), pulled him onto the boat, and then Clark beat his head in with a winch handle. Good times.

This is the largest animal I\'ve ever killed. I gaffed him (yes it was a male), pulled him onto the boat, and then Clark beat his head in with a winch handle. Good times.

I stood in awe as Clark filleted him in 6 minutes flat:

This is the largest animal I\\\'ve ever killed. I gaffed him (yes it was a male), pulled him onto the boat, and then Clark beat his head in with a winch handle. Good times.


Clark
made an amazing Peruvian Ceviche and Fish Tacos with fresh Pico de Gallo and Jalapeño Salsa. After lunch, Clark and I lowered the dinghy into the water and headed towards Los Arcos. We landed on a protected sandy cove, then ventured to the other side of the peninsula where five foot waves were crashing on the beach. I started body surfing and Clark followed suit. We drew a crowd as most folks don’t body surf that break.

Anchored off Cabo, we took the dinghy to Los Arcos:

Anchored off Cabo, we took the dinghy to Los Arcos.

I was in and out of the water a lot that weekend and the only sour note of the trip was that I got stung by a Jelly Fish during one of my dips. Maybe the ghost of that Mahi Mahi came back to get me!

Over the last nine years, Clark has treated me to sailing adventures in Mexico, Costa Rica, Thailand and Australia. Later this summer he will end his circumnavigation in San Francisco. I look forward to helping him acclimate to life in the Bay Area. I wonder what new adventures we’ll be reminiscing about nine years from today…

Elias Terman is a marketing executive at Acteva and lives in San Francisco.

Clark at sea for next 10 days

admin May 5th, 2008

Hello everyone. Clark just took off on a 10 day sail from Cabo with his father and will be incommunicado for a bit. He’ll answer any comments and questions when he returns.  Keep them coming!

Finding Crew

Clark May 3rd, 2008

Looking back on the 6000 or so miles since the Horn, I’ve sailed 80% of it solo. Some of this has been by choice, but for the most part I would rather have had company. In desolate Patagonia there are really no options: There’s just nobody around. Once I did start meeting people, I never knew quite what I was getting. People never really think about it, but almost everyone we meet in daily life comes through ‘the filter.’ If someone is a friend of a friend, or a member of the same organization, chances are that by the time we meet them there are many compounded years of others knowing this person. Once they get to us, we can be pretty sure they’re not a psychopath, otherwise the filter would have filtered them out long ago. On the road there is no filter, and people who seem quite normal and charming to begin with can end up being trouble. But of course not everyone is trouble. Sometimes these encounters can be just peachy, but they seldom last.

Take this guy, Nick:

He was a good surfer and a professional volleyball player. We could have volleyball sharked our way up the coast and made a mint, but Nick had to go back to San Juan del Sur, Nicaragua, to sell real estate.

Then there’s good old Larry:


After a few days Larry had to go back to Tamarindo, Costa Rica, to sell real estate. Is every gringo in Central America selling real estate? Yes, every gringo in Central America is selling real estate.

Then there was Max, a perfect example of what can happen without the filter:


Everything started out great with Max, but then he drank all the beer in the bar and peed all over my shoulder. I’m not kidding; he really did drink all the beer and peed on me. Et tu, Max?

I tried sailing for a while with my brother Rufus, but as you can see, Rufus is mentally challenged:


I had to tape foam rubber on all the sharp corners around the boat, and keep Rufus tightly secured in his harness.

“Pull the rope, Rufus!”
“OK Clar, I pull the rope!”

The rope just led to a piece of bungee cord on the foredeck, but it kept Rufus busy. Having Rufus aboard was a bad idea and we were both badly injured. Now he’s getting the kind of professional care he deserves.

Of course there was Norman. You remember Norman. Our time was short, and Norman was gone as quickly as he came. Where are you now, Norman? Where are you now?

I did my stint with the Bond Girls:


But geeze, all the nudity and public bathing. Really disgusting. And making me all those crepes and home cooked meals: What am I, a little kid? I had to ask them to leave.

There was this nutter I picked up wandering the wharf in Mazatlan. Glad I got rid of him:

And of course there were the romantic liaisons. A sailor has a girl in every port, right? They’ve been hit and miss. There was Imelda:


But her passion burned too strong to sustain. Perhaps I’m not man enough for this much woman.

I’ve recovered from the tragedy of Bianca. We were deeply in love, but the cultural differences could never be bridged. Her family would never accept me, and we had to return to our respective worlds. I still hold hope in my heart that the world will become a more accepting place and we’ll have another chance at love someday:

Then, when I least expected it, there she was. It’s funny how you can search and search for something, then when you give up the search, there it is in front of you. She was basking in the surf. A mermaid, she was! All her curves and feminine charms gloried under the sun and the eyes of God. The sea water glistened off her body, and she was looking longingly at Condesa before I even approached. She had adventure in her eyes and voyaging in her heart. I walked up to her, ankle deep in the surf, snapped this photo, and the rest is history:

Kudos to Matt for posting this manually, since we’re still having problems with the website.

Cabo San Lucas

Clark May 1st, 2008

Condesa is now anchored in Cabo San Lucas, amid squadrons of sea lice (jet skis). At the moment there are no less than four giant cruise ships anchored in the bay, with their shoreboats running round-the-clock carrying passengers ashore to shop before ferrying them back out the the feeding troughs. Cabo is still a beautiful place and the water is clear. I just wish they could turn down the volume a bit. The dry desert air has made all the ropes on Condesa stiff and cranky, and the sails are so dry and stiff I can’t get the covers over them.

Since the last post I’ve had visitors galore, now that I’m getting close to California and cheap flights. After my mom left Bahia Tenacatita I sailed to Yelapa to meet my stepmom, little brother and sister for my stepmom’s 50th birthday. Yelapa is still charming, but a few days is just the right amount of time to spend there. There are some resident American hippies who are fun to get to know at first, but you can just tell that if you stayed around long enough you’d end up with a shiv in your kidney. One guy was pumping up a fire on the beach for a big full moon party. When it didn’t materialize we asked him what happened the next day: ‘Why the fuck does everyone need me to make a fucking fire?’ (Maybe because you were the one going around all day saying you were going to make a fire on the beach?)

I charged 200 miles north to Mazatlan, where Elias met me to sail across the Sea of Cortez. We caught a big mahi mahi right outside of Cabo, which I’m still eating my way through. Elias left Tuesday and had to get a steroid shot back in the US for all his jellyfish stings. Good times.

My dad gets here on Saturday to do the final push back to California.

Unfortunately this website is still experiencing technical difficulties, so I can’t upload any photos. I could repeat what the problem is, but it would just confuse us all…something about the cat, chased by the dog that turns the fan that pushes the bits down the Internets. Internet cafes have been few and far between, so now I’m getting caught up.

A Long and Lonely Thousand Miles

Clark April 12th, 2008

The novelty of the long and soulful solo passage has long since worn off. It was lonely and boring out there, but the alcoholism helps.

I left Nicaragua to meet my mom in Manzanillo, Mexico, exactly two weeks later. I figured I’d have plenty of time to get to Puerto Madero in a few days, then Huatulco, then cruise on up the Mexican Riviera. I tended to overestimate my day’s runs because I planned on there actually being WIND. The winds were light – I could only sail a few hours per day – and there was a foul contrary current that started in the middle of the Gulf of Tehuantepec and set me back at the frustrating rate of 1.5-2 knots. It made for day’s runs of about a hundred miles, mostly motoring and burning lots of expensive Central American fuel.

With every possible landfall I realized that I had to keep moving or I wouldn’t make it on time. As it turned out, my mom could see Condesa sailing across Manzanillo Bay from the window of her airplane. The timing worked out exactly right, except that she was actually expecting me to meet her at the airport.

There was an amazing amount of wildlife out there. I saw humpback whales almost every day:

They were doing a lot of acrobatics for me:

Do you know how long you have to stand there on a rocking boat, and how many times you have to try, to get a picture like this? And it’s still out of focus.

And then there were the turtles. I must have seen 10,000 sea turtles between Nicaragua and Mexico. When the weather is calm the whole sea is dotted with them, mostly green turtles, some hawksbills, and I think some Olive Ridley’s. It’s hard to believe they are endangered when there are so many to be seen, but it makes me feel good that I’ve been cutting my plastic six pack rings all these years before throwing them in the water.

When Condesa hits a sea turtle it makes a resounding thump. I assume this doesn’t hurt the turtle as Condesa is a pretty blunt object and the turtles have solid shells, but with so many of them there’s occasionally a collision. You’d think for an animal who has a brain the size of a pea there would be a very simple process: Sense danger…dive. But they’re sometimes sleeping or daydreaming, Condesa comes up upon them, and instead of executing a simple dive—as they have plenty of time to do—they panic! They sort of flop on one side, slap a flipper against the water, and blow all their air out in a torrent of bubbles. Then, after a couple seconds, they regain their composure and do the dive. I watched this dozens of time, since they will panic in exactly the same manner if Condesa passes close alongside them. By the same token, a turtle that sees Condesa at say, twenty yards, will submerge smoothly with no floundering about.

Here’s one of our friends:

And here’s one with a bird on his back. If this bird had a sea snake in his mouth we’d be well on our way to some sort of new Mesoamerican creation myth:

My best company of the whole trip came along when this flock of seabirds started dive bombing Condesa. They’d fly right into her side and swerve away at the last minute with a lots of squawking. I tried to get photos, but flying birds are notoriously hard to capture. I ended up with lots of blurry photos of the sea in the background. Anyway, this went on for about an hour, to where the novelty was wearing off and I wished they’d shut up. They kept getting more and more bold, until finally they were landing on the foredeck. With my past experiences with birdshit, I shooed them away.

A while later there was a strange gerb in the middle of the table in the main salon. I was stumped as to where this could have come from and finally convinced myself that I must have spit it there, eating like a bachelor an hour or so before. Then another hour after that I was sitting at the same table reading, I glanced down by my feet, and ahhhh! Norman! He instantly became Norman–he just looked like a Norman–and he was one of these seabirds, and he was sitting on my floor.

He must have come in through one of the open portholes. Now it was all clear, the gerb in the middle of the table was the first of many gifts from Norman.

Since Norman was the first live being in my world in about a week, we had lots to talk about. My first effort was to capture him in a towel and get him out on deck where he could fly away. I figured he just couldn’t find his way out of the boat. He pecked at me a few times, and this didn’t hurt at all: a laughable effort at self-defense. I got him up on deck, poised on the roof of the aft cabin, and he just sat there. I got him back in the towel and looked him over: no broken wings, no broken legs. He seemed fine. “Norman, there’s nothing wrong with you! It’s all in your head! You can fly! I’m telling you. With each passing minute we’re getting farther and farther away from the flock!” Nope, he just wanted to hang out.

I tried giving him some fresh water and I had some fresh dorado in the fridge. He wouldn’t touch either.

He was already starting to accept me. He didn’t peck at me anymore and didn’t seem at all scared. We were going to be shipmates.

The one problem with my new shipmate was that he was not potty trained. He shat about every ten minutes, but like a master with an ill-behaved dog I was willing to accept this because he was now mine and I was very lonely. Maybe this was what was wrong with him: He had the trots and couldn’t fly.

He stayed the whole first night under the table. The next day, after he’d had a good rest, I took him back out on deck and he still wouldn’t fly away. He was becoming quite tame. He’d sit on my lap, I could pet him, he’d preen a bit. I was already having visions of Norman becoming the Condesa pet, just like Long John Silver with his parrot. I’d be able to smuggle him through customs everywhere: I could just say ‘Oh, that sea bird? He must have just landed there.’

That night I caught a sierra. This is love: I cut open the sierra’s belly and removed four fry in various states of digestion. I brought one to Norman and ooh, he knew what that was. He gobbled it right up. I had found his natural diet: He wasn’t into dorado filets, but whole little fishies. Since the four fry didn’t look like much of a meal, I cut up some bits of the sierra too, and did my best to make them look like faux fry. Norman gobbled up his repast with gusto, a pretty big meal for a little guy, and promptly shat it all out on my Turkish rug.

How long could I supply him with his insatiable and finicky appetite? And what had become of his flock? And where was home? Was Norman getting hopelessly lost after covering 150 miles on Condesa?

He spent a second night under the table, but was spending half of the time nestled on my lap. He was very warm and soft, and for all I know he was a she, a Norma.

On the third day I brought him up into to the cockpit. I could tell the minute he saw daylight that he was going to make a run for it. I set him on the aft cabin top, he ruffled his feathers, and away! He charged out over the water, surfed the air current down a wave, pirouetted once or twice, then landed in the water and just sat there. Hmm.

I was worried about him. What if he was sick and that was a far as he could make it? He could now be easy prey for some predator. I dropped the sails and went back for him. It was very calm and he was easy to keep in sight.

I got close but he flew a hundred yards away and landed on the water again. He was afraid of Condesa and I couldn’t get close to him. It was hopeless. ‘Norman, come back!’ I tried four or five times, but Condesa spooked him every time and he ran for it. I contemplated launching the windsurfer board and paddling to him. Back in Lima I would have gladly killed little Norman as a contributor to the birdshit problem. Now in the middle of the ocean, I was contemplating risking my life to save him. In the end the risk of getting separated from Condesa on the open sea was too great. I wouldn’t have wanted to have spent my last days of life cursing myself for giving it all up for a seabird, and wringing little Norman’s neck for my last meal.

I had to leave him, and it broke my heart. He was bobbing among the waves, looking at me longingly. I felt like Tom Hanks leaving Wilson the volleyball behind, but Norman was a living, breathing bird. Maybe he’s fine. Who knows? I don’t even know what species he is…the cute and friendly species.

Leaving Norman behind put me in a dark and maudlin mood.

Norman in his favorite spot under the table:

Norman and I parted ways in about the middle of the Gulf of Tehuantepec. The Gulf of Tehuantepec is notorious for dangerous offshore gales, called Tehuantepeckers. It’s funny looking back to the first time I crossed the Gulf of Tehuantepec nine years ago. A big group of cruisers got together in a restaurant to discuss our ‘strategy.’ We all had steely looks as if we were going off to war. We compared weatherfaxes and weather reports and finally set off, en masse, as if being in a group would make any difference if things went wrong…maybe give us something to run into. It was a brave and terrible undertaking.

This time I called the Port Captain in Puerto Madero as I passed, got three totally contradictory and meaningless weather reports, then charged across solo thinking, ‘Bring on a fifty knot Tehuantepecker, please. At least I’ll be able to sail.’

Here is the notorious Gulf of Tehuantepec during my daring solo passage:

Making such slow progress I would have arrived in Huatulco on a Saturday, meaning I would have either been charged exorbitant overtime charges, or been put off till Monday to clear into Mexico. I pulled a sneaky night at anchor in a hidden cove to get some sleep and pressed on early the next morning. I figured I wanted to avoid clearing in at Tackypulco too, because the offices are scattered all over town. Zihuatanejo was the place: All the offices were in the town square and I could arrive on a weekday.

After nine days at sea without speaking to anyone except Norman, the Port Captain in Puerto Madero, and the voices in my head, I finally made landfall in Zihuatanejo. I was running low on fuel with all that motoring and wasn’t sure if I was going to make it. I’d just read this article in a sailing magazine about calculating your motoring range based on your useable fuel reserve. The writer was careful to point out that your useable reserve is not the same as what your tanks hold, because the fuel pickup is usually an inch or two above the bottom of the tank so that dirt from the bottom of the tank doesn’t get sucked in. It’s all useable, damn it! I drained both tanks from the sump, put the fuel in a jug, then built a sort of a day tank connected with a hose to the filter. This way I had every last drop of diesel to burn.

In the end I arrived with this much fuel:

There’s at least a quart there. That’s not cutting it too close, is it?

In a bizarre, sleep-deprived, semi-hallucinatory state, I ended up partying on Condesa with all of the officials in Zihautanejo. There was a cruise ship just in port and all of the launches were busy, so the officials ended up stuck on Condesa for about an hour. The doctor from Port Health was the instigator, but the customs gal, the immigration gal, and the Port Captain were all up for it too. The deal was that I had more alcohol than I was allowed to bring in to Mexico, and we could either drink it or they could confiscate it. We drank it. This was all done with smiles and I was happy to oblige. Did that really happen? Was I really partying and dancing, making jokes about drug smuggling, with uniformed Mexican officials?

Here is Condesa anchored in front of the famous La Casa Que Canta in Zihuatanejo:
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And then I met Roberto, a member of the Acapulco Yacht Club taking one of his annual cruises. Roberto had a full-time captain, who was really a full-time bartender, and my two days in Zihuatenajo are just a blur. Here is Roberto and me after drinking all the Tequila in Zihuat:
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I pressed the last few days to Manzanillo, just anchoring here and there to sleep along the way, and now we’re at Las Hadas, the hotel where the movie ‘10’ was filmed. Las Hadas was a haunt for the rich and famous back in the 50’s and 60’s, but now it’s seeming a little long in the tooth. The architecture is still amazing. Las Hadas needs a new PR/marketing manager to start bringing in the best DJ’s from Europe and put the place back on the map.

Las Hadas:

We finally crossed paths with Sandy Purdon from San Diego, a friend of Matt Thoene, the builder of this website. Sandy kindly invited my mom, also Sandy, out to dinner at Las Hadas with his shipmates, Rich and Doc:

The two Sandys and me:
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From here it’s off to Barra de Navidad…

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